Decaf Picket Fences

I'll be the first to admit it when I make a mistake-including the fact that I probably should have done laundry tonight. Or written a blog post at least once in the last month or so...but I messed that up quite a bit. In fact, I could look at the last few weeks and count up enough mistakes to string together a mile of mishaps.

I could tell you all about the mistakes I've made this semester (yes, I know...I'm only two weeks in), from taking on a full course load plus a job plus labs plus club positions...to rando-roommates that make life a little more complicated than I care to admit...I've had my fair share of stress. Which also isn't an excuse to slack on what's important to me.

In fact, turning back to string all those mistakes together would be a mistake itself...because in looking through all of that, I would completely miss all the great things that have happened in the last two weeks...and let me tell you, they've been pretty great.

I do have a job this semester, a job that-no matter how difficult it can be to manage my time-is something that I sincerely enjoy doing. I work as a sort of tutor-though maybe a little more involved than your average tutor. And while I may not be pursuing it as a career, I do have a passion for teaching...or for watching others learn. It makes me feel a little more whole inside each time, and I have so many opportunities to help so many people through this position.

I also have a family here at school that I wouldn't trade for any other family in the world....and no, unfortunately I don't mean my school as a whole, though I do have a tremendous amount of gratitude for all that it has offered me. I mean a close-knit group of friends that is always-ALWAYS-there for me. I can count on them to listen at all times, to feed me too much sugar when I need it, to go on late night adventures for coffee that I surely don't need, and to let me be their fourth roommate when I need to escape the stress that is 18 hours of classes. I'm serious when I say this....I love these people so much. And I owe them a lot more than I could ever give.

I've also started yoga this semester, which is...a stretch...ha...ha ha. Don't worry, I haven't lost my wit. But really, even if it starts before the sun rises, it is an interesting new development in my routine...and I will let you know when I reach pretzel status.

Also, I've found a church that I really love...and I don't mean, yeah, it's okay. I mean...it reminds me of my roots. It's not huge and formal and intimidating...it's small and cozy and passionate. And that's what gets me excited.

Among other great things (a creative writing class that gives me life...a physics class that makes my eyes sparkle...some opportunities at things I've never experienced, but hope to do more of....an executive position in a club that helps me explore more and more writing....coffee, coffee, and more coffee), is that I'm really starting to find myself. I'm starting to figure out what I love, and what I want to do with my life. I'm also learning my limits...both the easy way, and the hard way. I feel stretched a little too thin at times, but it can be a good thing. Because I know that know matter how hard I'm pulled, and no matter what gets thrown at me, this fighter isn't going to break.

But it's going to take some work on my part. I'm going to have to loosen up on the reins-a lot-and let God take over. I'm going to have to get back into a routine, and I'm going to have to start trusting Him and praising Him more than I do...because I definitely don't do it enough. Because I've learned the hard way that the only way to find balance in my life is to set Him at the top of it all. He's the only one that knows what's in my heart and in my head...and He's the only one who can lead me to what is right.

So, despite my long absences, here is another update on the happenings in my life, and it's good to get some things out. I love you all, so much, and I hope you have an excellent week. You're all in my prayers. Stay cool, you decaf picket fences. Stay cool.